Don't Trip Off The Glitz
by Juliet Hummel-Anderson
Summary: AU. In the pageant circut, Kurt Hummel was a legend: and male at that. Not many males won beauty pageants, but most males weren't Kurt Hummel. He's about to go to NYC when the worst thing possible happens: a car wreck.
1. Introduction

_**Don't Trip Off the Glitz**_

**A/N: I was watching the TLC show 'Toddlers and Tiaras' when I saw the episode about the kid Brock and immediately thought of Kurt. So blame me being sick and my TV for this little story. Ha. Ha ha. I like it. Okayyyy enough rambling Jules, on to the story. And yes, the story title was taken from the Adam Lambert (lawd I love him) song For Your Entertainment.**

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><p><em>Introduction<em>

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><p>Kurt started gymnastics when he was five, and began pageants at six. Mollie Hummel, despite the flac she caught, never suggested the ideas, Kurt told her himself. It was all him. At first, Burt was extremely hesistant to do it. But, who was he to let down his son? And while he most likely would turn out gay (he realized after Kurt wanted to enter the Miss Lima pageant) Burt made the decision right then to support him.<p>

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><p>"And coming up is constestant number 17, Kurt!"<p>

Kurt, aged seven, walked out in a light blue tux (with a silver bowtie) and did he little pageant rountine, showing off all aspects of his personality. He was smiling and chubby cheeked the whole time. He looked amazing (no make up, that's where Mollie drew the line) and he looked like he was having the time of his life.

Burt looked worriedly around the room. Would anyone judge his son? Would anyone judge them? Would anyone assume they were pushing this on their son, or be mad they were supporting him?

Mollie cheered as the adorable little boy walked back on the stage during the talent portion. He did his dance/gymnastics routine flawlessly, and she was incredibly proud of her little boy for not only doing so well, but for having the courage to get on the stage and being who he was.

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><p>Kurt could do a full backhandspring at seven and he used it to his advantage as young boy in the pageant circut. He was dominating local glitz pageants that allowed boys to compete. It got so serious, meaning Kurt got so good, that they would travel to other states so he could compete against bottle blonde little girls, and every once in a while, a boy like him.<p>

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><p>"My name's Ryan," the little blonde boy in the sparkly blue fedora said. Kurt grinned, aged eight, smiled too in his silver, sparkly ensemble and stuck out his hand.<p>

"Kurt," he grinned, teeth not showing. "Are you in the pageant, too?"

Ryan nodded, blue eyes gleaming. "Uh huh, so is my sister. But to be honest, I'm way better than her. I think more boys should do pageants. Normally I see a lot in New York, but-"

"New York?" Little Kurt asked. "What's that?"

Ryan stuck out his chest a little and said, "It's where I'm going to be one day. I'm going to be on Broadway."

"Broadway?" Kurt asked, listening for his number to be called."

Ryan grinned and said, "I'll tell you one day. I like you. Do you want to be my friend?"

Of course, Ryan killed the ten year old age division and Kurt won all of the awards possible in the eight age division.

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><p>People thought it was cute when he was little. But once he hit seventeen and was still doing them, eyebrows were raised and questions were asked. Usually Kurt ignored them. He went on with his daily life, until one day he was able to enter in a pageant in New York.<p>

And that's where our story begins.

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><p>"Okay, Kurt, do your routine again, this time perfect!" His dance coach shouted, checking his watch. "You want to win, right?"<p>

Kurt nodded, clad in his workout gear and proceeded to do his routine. He got all of the kicks and turns right, and the ballet combined with gymnastics was flowing beautifully. He grinned and did his final geusture, ending his routine to the song 'Love The Way You Lie', the original version by Skylar Gray. He looked to his dance coach to see him grinning before pulling him into a hug.

"Awesome job, Kurtsie," Ryan grinned, that day wearing a peach colored fedora. Kissing him lightly on the forehead, the nineteen-year-old looked him over again and nodded. "I think you'll knock 'em dead. Where's this pageant?"

Kurt grinned coyly and said, "Oh, nowhere..."

"Seriously? I kind of have to go with you, where is it?" Ryan grinned slinging an arm around his boyfriend.

"Oh fine," Kurt sighed dramatically. "It's in New York. I'm hoping for grand or ultimate."

Ryan nearly squealed and said, "Okay, now I have to go!"

Kurt grinned and grabbed his dance bag, leaving the local dance studio to get into Ryan's chic white Prius. If Kurt was honest, everything about the boy screamed 'gay' but who was he to talk? He was as attracted to the male anatomy as Ryan (whose short blonde hair was sticking straight up today). Kurt opened the car door for his boyfriend then hopped in the passenger side himself. He felt really lucky to have someone like Ryan, who he could be a gentleman for and take on dates and give flowers to and be the little spoon for.

Ryan was driving him back to his house when he leaned over and pecked him on the lips. Kurt, being the hormonal boy he is, deepened it, causing Ryan to run a stop sign. Realizing it, he broke the kiss to look at the road, only to be hit head on by an eighteen wheeler.

The last thing Kurt remembers is seeing a bright light and getting a text from Blaine.


	2. Interlude

_Interlude_

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><p>Beep. Beep. Beep.<p>

He blinked his eyes wearily before wincing at the pounding in his head. Looking at his surrounds, Kurt concluded he was in a hospital. Did he hit his head on the dumpster when Karofsky threw him in? He blinked again, shaking his head softly. A throat was cleared and Kurt looked to his bedside, where Burt, Finn, and a strange woman were sitting, smiles etched onto their faces.

"Hey," Burt said softly. "You okay bud?"

"Yeah, Karofsky must've thrown a little too hard this time," Kurt mumbled, barely audible, looking at Finn. Of course, that prompted immediate worried looks from his family. "What?"

The woman stood and said softly, "I'll tell the doctor you've awaken." Politely she excused herself and Finn followed like a puppy with one quick glance at Kurt, who watched him leave with a familiar look on his face. Burt quickly looked his son in the eye and said, "Kurt? What is the last thing you remember?"

"Karofsky threw me in the dumpster..." Kurt said warily, wondering about the odd look in his father's eye, then realized he'd revealed the bullying to his father, whom he wasn't ready to come out to yet. "I mean, uh-"

"I know about the bullying, Kurt, because it happened three years ago," Burt said, frowning. "Are you sure that's the last thing you remember?"

"Yes," Kurt said finally. Of course, the doctor chose that moment to walk in and say, "Hello, Mr. Hummel, it seems your boyfriend is doing just fine."

Kurt's eyes widened. "What?" He glanced to his father to gauge a reaction, but when there wasn't one, Kurt was even more confused than before. "I'm really confused."

Burt stood to say to the doctor quietly, "He can't remember the last three years of his life."

The doctor's eyes widened. "Oh no," he started. "Let me run some tests. Kurt, what year is it?"

"2008?" Kurt said, raising an eyebrow.

"It just recently became 2012," the doctor said, pulling out a stool to sit on. "The day?"

"Wednesday?" Kurt tried, though if the year is wrong, he's postive the day will be, too.

"Saturday. Date?"

"September 4th," Kurt said wearily.

"January 21st," the doctor said with a sigh. "I'm afraid if my assumption is correct, he has retrograde amnesia. His memory was completely wiped of the past three years in the car crash. Ryan appears to be okay, so maybe it was the angle of the car on his skull, or the force of the impact, but it's how his body has reacted. I'm sure he has a lot to catch up on," the doctor said sadly, "Though I'm sorry to say there's no medication for this kind of thing. Sometimes memories do jog, though. Maybe put together a collection of pictures, songs, or videos?"

Burt nodded curtly. "Thanks, can we have a moment alone?"

When the doctor left, Burt turned to him. "I know you're gay," Burt started. "And I love you just as much. But there are some things you need to know. I married Finn Hudson's mother-"

*"I think I wanna marry you!"

The final notes of the song closed and Kurt watched, teary eyed, as Carole and Burt exchanged vows. He actually did cry towards the end, but quickly wiped away any tears. He was so glad his dad had found someone as amazing as Carole to spend the rest of his life with after his mom died.*

"I remember," Kurt said with awe. "I remember. Her name is Carole Hudson. Finn is my stepbrother," Kurt said, feeling mixed emotions at forgetting the past three years of his life.

Burt was surprised. "Yes, that's right. You do pageants, remember? You were on your way to New York to compete. Ryan-"

"Ryan!" Kurt grinned. "He's my best friend, right?"

"Your boyfriend," Burt corrected. "Your best friends are Rachel Berry and Blaine Anderson."

"Rachel," Kurt growled, "Is an annoying spoiled brat who beats me in every pageant. There's no way she can be my best friend. And who in the world is Blaine Anderson?"

A knock was heard on the door, and a short and stocky boy with dark curly hair and a sweater vest ran into the room, babbling, "Kurt, oh my God, are you okay? I was so worried and when I got the call I came right over-"

"Blaine," Burt began. "There's something you should know."

"Who are you?" Kurt interrupted, eyes widening. A bit of a song he'd never heard before flashed into his head (something about skintight jeans?) before leaving again. The boy's hazel eyes met Kurt's sadly.

"Oh God," he breathed, closing his eyes. "What does he remember?"


	3. Smooth Criminal

**Just a side note: It may seem like Kurt's memory is being jogged too fast. But think about it: (most of) the major memories he'll get back first. But the little things may take a while.**

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><p>Blaine stared blankly at Ryan, laying in his hospital bed, eating toast with blueberry jam. The curly-haired boy raised his eyebrows at the boy's uncaring attitude towards Kurt.<p>

"So he doesn't remember us dating?" Ryan smiled, motioning towards the reruns of Four Weddings. "He doesn't remember me getting him first?"

Blaine clenched his fist and resisted the urge to punch the living hell out of this dickhead but remained calm, cool, and collected. "He doesn't remember winning any major pageants either," Blaine said, "When will we tell him that he's going to New York in a month when he doesn't even remember his routine?"

Ryan smiled, "We won't."

"Oh, so you want to break his heart and destroy his pageant career? Some boyfriend you are," Blaine muttered, before standing to leave the hospital room. He had forgotten why he'd visiting the smug idiot in the first place. After visting Kurt, and getting the rude awakening, he'd decided he'd be the guy to break the news to his jerky boyfriend.

In the hallway he was greeted with someone that sent waves of nervousness crashing into his stomach, and not in a good way. Sebastian Smythe was in the hallway, a bouquet of yellow roses in his hands and a smirk on his meerkat face.

"Hello, Anderson," Sebastian said, and Blaine gulped.

"Smythe," he muttered, trying to push past him.

"Well, now that Kurt has no recollection of the past two year's events, I might just inform him about you shattered my ever-so-fragile heart, and in my suffering he helped piece me back together, and I've been in love with him ever since."

"Why is everyone so convinced on the idea to lie to Kurt?" Blaine asked, taking a firm step towards Sebastian. "That's not what happened and you know it."

Sebastian grinned and took a step foward. "Is it now? Want me to tell him about the boxing? The hitting your problems when you get angry? The nights you-"

"Sebastian," Blaine gritted out. "He has no idea who I am anymore. If you somehow change the way he views me, I swear to God I will end you." He knocked on the door again and Burt answered.

"Hey Blaine, come on in," Burt said, then eyed Sebastian. "Who're you?"

"Sebastian Smythe," he said, sticking out a hand. Burt looked to Blaine, who obviously appeared to hate the guy.

"I think it'd be best if you came back later."

Sebastian simply smiled and walked away, eyeing Blaine as he walked into the hospital room.

Blaine eyed Kurt again, who looked wary at the idea of him being there. "I'm Blaine," he started. "Sorry I ran out, I get like that sometimes..."

"It's fine..." Kurt said. "How exactly did we meet?"

Blaine grinned and pulled up a chair, and took a chance. He sang lightly, "Before you met me, I was alright but..."

"Things were kinda heavy," Kurt said. "Oh God..." he breathed. "That song is by Katy Perry, right? I can't believe I just sang the words to a song I don't know..."

"I sang that song to you when you went to spy on Dalton for Sectionals," Blaine admitted, rubbing the back of his neck.

_"You make me feel like I'm livin' a _  
><em>Teenage dream<em>  
><em>The way you turn me on!"<em>

_Sparkling eyes...coffee shop...Wes, David...charming smile..._

_Blaine._

"To me?" Kurt breathed. "Blaine Everett Anderson, to think I thought you were flirting with me..."

Realizing what he just said, Blaine wanted to tackle him in a hug, but settled for that crinkly eyed smile that he saved for special occasions. Kurt smiled and Burt just looked confusedly between the two. Those two...he would never understand.


End file.
